It's all about attitude

What can I say, a few days shy of my second birthday, I've keenly honed a highly developed sense of myself. Never known to suffer fools gladly, I've taken to showing off my true self, the whole unvarnished truth. Why should I shield from my adoring public my desire to wear flashy sunglasses and ornate tiaras? Does the world not deserve to know my true feelings on anything but blue yogurt or papa waking me up in the morning? I do my best to leave my mark on everyone I come in contact with and so far I think I'm doing an admirable job.